Superhero Enthusiasts of America
by bauerfreak
Summary: Response to forensicsfan's challenge. Nick and Sara are assigned to a superhero convention crime scene.


- Must contain at least some Snickery flirtation

- Must contain someone initiating a conversation about super heroes.

- Must assign super hero names to at least three CSI characters (lab

people are fair game)

- Must render someone speechless

- Extra points if you manage to sneak a Snickers bar into the story.

You never really get used to seeing a dead body at a crime scene. Sure, it loses the edge and the awesome feeling of finality and doom over time, but…it's a dead body. That person's dead. They'll never walk around, or laugh, or run, or feeling anything again. But occasionally, there are amusing cases that remind you of just how human that person was.

Sara and I had been assigned to a crime scene at the Bellagio. We get a lot of weird-ass conventions in this fine town of ours, and this year has been no exception. Highlights include the Transvestite Convention, the Mars Company Convention (still underway), and currently the Superheroes Enthusiasts of America Convention.

I'm always more than thrilled to work with Miss Sara Sidle. I mean come on, she's smokin'. And she's smart as a whip, and keeps me on my toes. Little old Texas A&M grad me, find myself learning tons from the Harvard grad. But do

I let her know that I totally worship her? Not on the outside. I'm not sure if she feels the same way about me, so I'll just wait until the time is right.

"It never ceases to amaze me what people do with their free time." Sara announced as we stood at the door of the main room assigned for the Superheroes Convention. Huge punch out characters were everywhere, that the participants had probably stolen from their local Blockbuster or comic book store. There was an undeniable feeling of pure nerdiness filling the room, and we took a deep breath as we stepped through the threshold.

In one corner, there was already the clichéd crime scene. The coroner hunched over a body on the floor, surrounded by police officers securing the scene, and that dividing band of yellow tape. As we neared the scene, I could smell that familiar dead body feeling.

"What do we have, Super Dave?" I crouched down next to the coroner and took in my first site of the dead body. Freak. The dude was dressed as friggin' Robin from the Batman shows. If Robin says anything about the male species, it affirms that some of them just can't get enough of some gay butt lovin'. And how do I come to that conclusion? Well, first of all, the guy sports his underwear over GREEN TIGHTS. He hangs around with the beefier, better-looking Batman, and third – this particular Robin impersonator had his very own home-made velcroed flap over his ass. That's right. You unvelcro the Velcro, and BAM! POW! ZAP! There's his naked ass staring right back at ya. Easy access, I guess. Bad mental image, I tell ya.

"We have evidence of anal intercourse." Dave reported. "He got an anal swab, and then I gave him another anal swab." He joked, laughing at himself.

"That's great, Super Dave. Any identification?" I looked over at Sara, who was busy processing the rest of the scene. She was holding up a poop-stained condom, eyeing it carefully. It had been found in a nearby trash can. I scrunched up my face and winced, turning back to Dave and Mr. Butt-lovin'.

"Dirk Digler."

"What?"

"I'm kidding."

CSI CSI CSI CSI CSI CSI

I was already sitting on one of the luxurious couches in the Bellagio lounge, sipping some water, as I watched Sara work her magic with one of the police officers. She seemed to be giving him some directions, exchanging some sort of information. I listened closely to see if she was flirting, which she has been known to do, but I didn't think I heard anything on my jealousy radar.

Sara sighed and looked over at me. Turning on her feet, she walked over to where I was sitting and plopped herself on the couch with me. I moved a little to make room, and Sara spread out, but I was still at a safe distance.

"When is this shift going to be over? These people are really freaking me out."

Since the dead body, we'd seen numerous superheroes wandering the place, including an overweight Cat Woman, several Batmans, and one Hell Boy. Don't know if that qualifies as a superhero, but everyone else seemed to think so.

"What? You don't like superheroes?" I teased her, flashing her my grin.

"My older brother was obsessed with comic books when I was a kid. It's more that I'm tired of it, I guess."

"He was obsessed, huh? Did he have a favorite?"

"Probably Spider-Man." Sara admitted, her head perched in her right hand from exhaustion. She is so beautiful when she's exhausted. Often, Sara doesn't show her vulnerable side, but times like this make her seem real and approachable to me. Maybe she seems more human this way.

"Spider-Man. Mine was probably Wonder Woman." I admitted, hoping it would make her laugh. It had its desired effect, making me laugh back even more.

"That figures." She rolled her eyes.

"Why's that?"

"Oh, come on! That's so shallow, Nick!"

"Oh is it? Okay, then what's yours?"

Sara was deep in ponderance for a moment as she contemplated her answer.

"I know what you're trying to do here." She smirked.

"What am I trying to do, Sara?"

"You're trying to make me admit I'm as shallow as you, but I'm not."

"Really? Who's the one who almost threw the case when you flirted with that guy at the wedding with the murdered mother of the groom?"

Sara let out a snort of disgust.

"Don't even get me started on that case, Nick. You let them steal your damn truck with all the evidence in it! And YOU flirted with one of the crazy bridesmaids!"

I nodded my head sheepishly, knowing I was probably even worse in the flirtation department.

"You had me there. I do flirt a lot at work." I admitted, wondering if she would say anything about my constant flirtation with her.

"You do."

"So, you notice?"

"Psh-yeah! You flirt with all the girls. And suspects…and victims…"

"None of them matter to me." I told her seriously, looking into her eyes. For a moment, I thought she might be getting the message, as she stared back into my eyes in thought and consideration. I thought I could finally maybe make my move when…

"Snickers bar, anyone?" A Bellagio employee came by holding a tray full of Snickers bars. "They're left over from the Mars Company Convention."

"Sure." I took one, and Sara did too. Don't know why, but there's nothing quite like a good Snickers bar. It's sweet, nutty, and scrumptious all around. We both took a bite, and felt a warm, fuzzy feeling overcome our bodies. Everything is better after a Snickers bar.

"So, Sara, if you could have any super power, what would it be?" I took a stab, and I would try to analyze her answer. Women love thoughtful men, I hear.

"I don't know. Maybe the ability to read minds. Or better yet, the ability to see people's farts. Then no one could deny when they blow one."

That was definitely not the answer I was expecting from the prim and proper Sara Sidle, and I almost choked on my candy bar. I managed to swallow it, and immediately burst out laughing at her revealing confession.

"See people's farts, huh? That's pretty disgusting, Sara. I mean, seriously. What kind of person WANTS to know when people are farting?"

"It would be the end of 'blamer's the flamer'." Sara shrugged sheepishly.

So much for being ladylike. But that's what I love about her. She's always surprising me and amazing me. Her fart wish was actually somewhat endearing.

"So, you'd be Fart Woman." I named her. "What would Grissom be?"

"Hmmm…He would be Socially Awkward Man. He'd have the ability to ruin conversation, spend too much time with insects, and lose all chances he has with women."

"Fair enough."

"How about Greg?"

"Greg would be Mackin' Boy. He has the ability to mack on a variety of female super heroes, and sleeps with his superiors to get ahead. Comes with his own box of Blue Hawaiian Coffee."

"Nice. Now, what would you be?"

"Let's see…Irresistible Man?" I tried, showing my laugh lines.

"Or Southern Hick Boy."

"Or Suave Man."

"Or Flirts-With-Anything-With-Two-Legs-and-a-Huge-Rack Man."

I was speechless. I really didn't know what to say. Is that all she thinks of me? Sara Sidle had rendered me, Nick Stokes, speechless.

"I'm kidding, Nick."

"Is that what you think I do?"

"Nick, I said I was kidding." She dismissed her comment, readjusting her position on the couch so she was definitely far away now.

"No, but obviously there's a little truth to it. I mean, I admit it. I flirt with women, but…I'm lonely, you know. If you don't have someone to share your life with, you tend to reach out to anyone who will bite."

"I listen." Sara said softly. She looked down, but after a few moments of me waiting to see if she was serious, Sara finally looked in my direction. Her face wasn't kidding. It was sincere and honest. She meant what she said, and I felt a pang of hope warm my heart. Maybe, just maybe I had a chance. We looked into each other's eyes for a few moments, silent.

"You're the best listener I know." I confessed. Sara's arm had become sprawled on the back of the couch. I took a chance and placed my hand over her much smaller, feminine one. She flinched momentarily, but then I saw the tiniest hint of a smile on her face.

I don't know quite who initiated it. I think it was mutual and equal. But minutes later, we were pulling away from our first, mind-blowing, heart-stopping, life-changing kiss. I KISSED SARA SIDLE! My heart wanted to pound out of my chest, and I didn't even think about how other people were around. Other professionals. All I could think about was Sara in that moment, and it was perfect.

"I know what your superhero name should be now." Sara grinned mischievously. I gently stroked her hair as I laughed, waiting for her answer.

"What's that?"

"Inadequate Kisser Man." She laughed, and then she moved to brace herself for what she knew was coming. I rolled my eyes and grabbed her side a couple of times, but didn't full-fledge tickle. I save my full-fledged tickling for the privacy of my own home.

"Well, you'll just have to help me practice so I can improve." I suggested, stroking her delicate, beautiful face with my finger. Sara smiled again, showing her gap-toothed smile that I love so much.

"That can be arranged."


End file.
